"THE COMEBACKS"
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MOVIE: *1/2 (out of 5 stars) DVD EXPERIENCE: *** (out of 5 stars) STARRING David Koechner as LAMBEAU FIELDS Carl Weathers as FREDDIE WISEMAN Melora Hardin as BARB FIELDS Matthew Lawrence as LANCE TRUMAN Brooke Nevin as MICHELLE FIELDS Unrated Studio: Fox Atomic Directed by: Tom Brady |
Like recent spoof goofs, “The Comebacks” sets its sights on a subgenre – inspirational sports movies. It’s not that there isn’t plenty of fodder out there. After all, we’ve seen these films reach a fever pitch with weepy grabs like “We Are Marshall” and “Glory Road.” However, like its contemporaries such as “Epic Movie,” this film handles the delicate comedy with the finesse of a chainsaw.
The movie follows a washed up coach named Lambeau Fields (David Koechner) who has been a loser all his life. He takes a final career stab at coaching a college football team, populated with character rip-offs of everything from “Friday Night Lights” to “Radio.”
Rather than actually feigning a story, “The Comebacks” is merely a hodgepodge of pop-culture references. Most of them draw from sports movies (which can be a little obscure, including references to “Stick It” and “Blue Crush”). Fortunately, it’s not as random as “Epic Movie” and “Meet the Spartans.” We don’t have to deal with crappy Paris Hilton wannabes in this film.
I tend to like David Koechner, but not in the lead role. His over-the-top caricature acting is only palatable in small doses. And while Brooke Nevin is fetching as his rebel daughter, she’s not enough to carry the rest of the all-too-annoying cast.
If you’re one of those people that just can’t get enough of substandard movie spoofs, you can check this one out and probably have a few laughs. However, it really tries too hard and has too many jokes that just fall flat.
The DVD comes in an unrated version, which really doesn’t live up to its name. Aside from a few more swear words, there’s not much extra in the cut. It would have been nice to have the gratuitous nude show of the Comeback cheerleaders, but the PG-13 aim was too clear in the film.
Otherwise, the special features are actually pretty decent, including a director’s commentary, deleted scenes, bloopers, cheerleader segments, and various behind-the-scenes moments where the actors goof on their characters and each other.
"THE GAME PLAN"
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MOVIE: *** (out of 5 stars) DVD EXPERIENCE: *** (out of 5 stars) STARRING Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson as JOE KINGMAN Madison Pettis as PEYTON KELLY Kyra Sedgwick as STELLA PECK Roselyn Sanchez as MONIQUE VASQUEZ Morris Chestnut as TRAVIS SANDERS Rated PG Studio: Walt Disney Directed by: Andy Fickman |
This film tells the story of Joe Kingman, an arrogant football hero who receives a huge reality check when his eight-year-old daughter he didn’t know he had shows up on his doorstep. Joe tries to adjust to his new fatherhood while keeping his football career on track.
In many ways, “The Game Plan” is really just a big-budget, feature-film version of a Disney Channel Original Movie. It’s a relatively simple and formulaic story that survives – and eventually thrives – on the size of its heart. The Rock makes a great turn to family comedies (as Schwarzenegger and Vin Diesel have done previously), but the real scene-stealer is Madison Pettis as his daughter.
Pettis first cut her teeth as the President’s daughter in the Disney Channel show “Corey in the House.” She is the heart of the film, and The Rock deftly throws the cuteness to her with perfect timing. Additionally, The Rock has oodles of charisma, which bode well for a smooth transition into the family comedy.
“The Game Plan” scored big in theaters, providing a perfect blend of machoism and family-friendly entertainment. The kids loved the little girl and the dog. The mothers loved the wholesomeness of the film. And the fathers loved all the football references. This is one of those rare films that has something for everyone, which is why it works amid the formulaic and predictable plot.
The DVD comes with a nice selection of features, including bloopers narrated by Marv Albert, deleted scenes, a behind-the-scenes featurette on the making of the film and two ESPN SportsCenter spots, one that profiles The Rock’s transition to a football hero on the screen and the other on the character of Joe Kingman. While there’s no games on the disc, there is a hidden feature that allows kids to change the mood lighting of the menu and also bedazzle different items in Joe Kingman’s bachelor pad.
"THE SIMPLE LIFE: SEASON 5"
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MOVIE: *1/2 (out of 5 stars) DVD EXPERIENCE: * (out of 5 stars) STARRING Paris Hilton as HERSELF Nicole Richie as HERSELF Not Rated Studio: FOX Television |
Ultimately, I’ve developed a tolerance for the spoiled brats. Paris, while vacuous and emotionally shallow, comes across well in the show and almost embodies the persona of the nice girl. Nicole, while clearly a diva and snotty brat, can be just plain funny sometimes. And this helped me stomach the otherwise weak final season of “The Simple Life.”
This time around, Paris and Nicole have buried the hatchet and joined forces for another season of television. Instead of being transplanted into different families, they get jobs as counselors at a summer camp in Malibu. Over five weeks, the girls try to make it through camps based on weight loss, survival, dramatics, relationships and a beauty pageant.
The biggest problem with this season, though, is that any semblance of “reality” is thrown out the window. The camp they attend is a renamed version of a Jewish church camp. The camp director family and other counselors are cast out of an agent’s office. The “storyline” is completely scripted, including the budding love between Paris and the hunky Hunter. There’s no reality here, and the season serves more as evidence in the WGA’s plight against producers for demanding compensation for writing reality TV.
Still, the season is not without some funny moments. These come more from the insane celebrity has-beens that try to catch a popularity wave on the show. Susan Powder comes in to oversee a fat camp, promptly giving the campers enemas and acting insane throughout the week. However, nothing beats Sally Kirkland going completely nuts while trying to get Nicole Richie to take acting seriously, then agreeing to appear in blackface as Lionel Richie in the “Paris and Nicole: The Musical” finale.
I can’t say I hated “The Simple Life: Season Five,” but I did watch about half the season with my jaw agape as if I were watching someone torture kittens. Still, I laughed at some parts, including when Nicole taught a slate of eight-year-old beauty pageant contestants to flip the bird.
If only this was actually real or unscripted, it might have been better.
"THE GIRLS NEXT DOOR: SEASON THREE"
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MOVIE: **1/2 (out of 5 stars) DVD EXPERIENCE: ** (out of 5 stars) STARRING Holly Madison as HERSELF Bridget Marquardt as HERSELF Kendra Wilkinson as HERSELF Hugh Hefner as HIMSELF Not Rated Studio: E! Entertainment Developed by: Kevin Burns |
But the pizzazz is back, and old Hef has his three blond bombshells Holly Madison, Bridget Marquardt and Kendra Wilkinson to thank for that. “The Girls Next Door: Season Three” is out on DVD, spotlighting their sometimes humdrum, sometimes wild lives. With three girlfriends whose combined ages barely surpass his own, the man seems sexually overwhelmed. The legendary Hef seems more at home eating celery hearts and hard boiled eggs than romping with these three bodacious babes. Maybe that’s why they love him so much. He seems pretty low maintenance.
Season three shows the girls more comfortable in front of the camera – and more comfortable with their polygamous on-camera relationships. Holly remains the alpha dog, often physically putting herself between Hef and the other girls. Fortunately, though, in this season, she’s laying off the marriage nag. That’s probably because Hef’s distracting her with an apprenticeship at the magazine.
Bridget remains my favorite, probably because she’s the most natural of the three. Kendra’s grown on me a bit, when I can get past her ghetto wannabe attitude. While Holly still holds out for the ‘til death do us part moment with Hef, Kendra and Bridget just seem happy and grateful they’ve found their way into this situation.
If you liked the first and second seasons, you’ll get more of the same in this one. They’re planning for parties, taking trips, reuniting with former Playmates and even entering into more mature ventures (like Kendra’s foray into real estate investment).
In fact, if you are at all interested in the show, the way to see it is on DVD. Why deal with bleeps and blurs on E! when you can hear Kendra’s foul mouth and watch all the Playboy bunnies in their uncensored, naked glory? Like those magazines I found in my dad’s bookcase, this is the closest to porn you can get and still be respectable.
The DVD comes with a bonus episode that serves as an hour-long retrospective on the show with Hef and the girls. There’s also commentary on all episodes with Holly, Bridget and Kendra, but I just can’t stand listening to them talk for that long to suffer through it.
"DIRT: THE COMPLETE FIRST SEASON"
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MOVIE: ** (out of 5 stars) DVD EXPERIENCE: **1/2 (out of 5 stars) STARRING Courteney Cox as LUCY SPILLER Ian Hart as DON KONKEY Alexandra Breckenridge as WILLA MCPHERSON Josh Stewart as HOLT MCLAREN Laura Allen as JULIA MALLORY Not Rated Studio: Touchstone Created by: Matthew Carnahan |
The brainchild of Coquette, the co-brand of husband/wife team Courteney Cox and David Arquette, “Dirt” tells the story of a tabloid magazine. Cox takes the leading role as the editor of the tabloid, and in many ways the show serves as a way for Hollywood to vent its spleen about the dangers of sensational journalism.
Cox’s character of Lucy Spiller is meant to be both sympathetic and biting. However, the show tries to walk the fence on this At times, we’re supposed to hate her. Other times, we’re supposed to feel sorry for her. Other characters like the sleazy managing editor and the imbalanced celebrities just aren’t likable enough to carry the show.
In fact, the only character that has any real depth and flavor to him is the schizophrenic photographer Don Konkey, expertly played by Ian Hart. However, Cox’s ego won’t allow him to take a front seat to her show, and we’re left with the spotlight on less interesting people.
The first season of “Dirt” is available on DVD, and there’s to be a second season this year. However, it will disappear into the wasteland of late-night cable television soon enough. Like too many Hollywood introspective shows, this is a prime example of the Hollywood elite being masturbatory in their focus and leaving the average viewer out of mind.
“Dirt: The Complete first Season” comes with a nice assortment of special features, including deleted scenes, outtakes, stories of true tabloid journalism, a profile on Don Konkey and a making-of featurette that highlights (surprise, surprise) Courtney Cox and David Arquette bemoaning the struggles of being a Hollywood couple.
